What are these heart flutters?

Audrey will be 10wks old tomorrow. Time sure has flown!

Our anniversary is Thursday---we are going away to downtown Vancouver for just over 24hrs tomorrow.

I ...was... all chill about leaving my daughter. Not sure if I still am.

My heart feels fluttery. My eyes feel watery. Could I be not ready? I never thought I would feel this way.

We've left her for a couple hours here or there but never this long.

Brent's mom is watching her. I have complete faith in her-she is the most patient, kind, tender, gentle and loving Grandma. It's me-me me me I'm worried about.

I'm not dropping her off until afternoon tomorrow and here I am feeling all emotional the night before.

Honestly I never thought this would be so hard. Wow. It's a weird feeling.

Big breath in big breath out
I can do it
I can have fun
I can be apart from Audrey for 24 hours. She's 10wks old she will be fine.

My prayer tonight is that I can pull it together and be at peace. Brent and I are celebrating four beautiful years of marriage!! I want to have fun and relish in what an amazing hubby I have been blessed with.




- I'll end with this picture of my precious gem. She is starting to suck her fingers sometimes...so cute...then I take them out in hope to avoid orthodontics :)




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Another first...Camping for three!

So it's 12:48pm
Mr.Converse is due home shortly and I'm a mess.

The plan was...
Husband home and ready set go!

Reality...
Packing/planning for three is a lot more work. So much more complicated that I needed a blogging break! (ha ha ha...more like a procrastination break)




-needed a self portrait of the mayhem I felt.

How many diapers for two nights...how about 50?

How many wipes?
How about 100?

How many outfits...to many!

For real brents going to come home and think were moving because everything is packed!

Another shameful mother moment...while packing...Audrey has been in the swing the whole time! Lots of 'swinging' today for Miss Converse...so bad I know!

Ok back to packing. Hopefully I can get it in order shortly!

And no, I totally did not work out today, and yes, all my summer cloths are still like saran wrap---boo!




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Day at home!

Ooooh
Aaaah

Something so beautiful about spending a cuddly day at home with my lil baby girl!

Morning cuddles that turn into morning giggles---and much of the same in the afternoon.

After a day like today I feel like I can take a deep breath and conquer the world---or at least a diaper explosion!!!

God had it planned perfect when he gave us Miss Audrey---she's my baby doll.

I love quiet days at home with my princess!!!


-taking her vitamin D drops(she loves it)

Tonight we had a baby shower for cute lil baby Elisha. So fun! He is so tiny and delightful---mama Donna blows my socks off. Looking so great!

Anyways---Audrey and I got home at 10:30 she ate and oddly enough she was wide eyed. Usually her eyes get heavy at 9pm. I put her in her bed awake just to see. Boom--asleep. Wow. She's incredible!


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Embaressing vs. Cute

Brent and I have a friendly debate going. Flower headbands...are they cute or embarrassing? Cast your vote :)








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Hubbys new favorite dinner

***what I did differently

Tripled cayenne pepper
Used 1/2 cup cream instead of 2 cups
Used 2 cups milk instead of 1/2 cup
Added two tomatoes
Added whole package of snap peas
Added two red peppers

***mixed everything together and put in 9x12 pan at 350 for 20 mins

***omitted vodka and wine :)


Seriously...SO yummy!




Ingredients
GRATINATA SAUCE
3 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons minced garlic
3 tablespoons marsala wine
2 cups heavy cream
1 cup grated parmesan cheese
1/2 cup milk
1/4 cup vodka
1/4 cup water
1/2 teaspoon chicken bullion
1 tablespoon cornstarch
1 tablespoon Grey Poupon Dijon Mustard
2 teaspoons minced fresh rosemary
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon minced fresh thyme
1/4 teaspoon ground cayenne pepper
1 lb penne rigate cooked
12 medium shrimp peeled and deveined
2 skinless chicken breasts
1/2 cup Prosciutto about 2 ounces thick-sliced, chopped
TOPPING
3 tablespoons grated parmesan cheese
1 1/2 teaspoons paprika



Instructions
Preheat bbq grill to high.

Prepare gratinata sauce by melting 3 tbls of butter over medium/low heat. Add garlic and sweat it for about 5 minutes. Be sure the garlic doesn't brown. Add the marsala wine and cook for another 5 minutes. Add the remaining ingredients for the sauce and whisk until smooth. Bring mixture to a simmer and keep it there for 10 minutes or until it's thick. Cover sauce and remove from heat.

Cook pasta following directions on the package (7-9 minutes in boiling water). You want the pasta tender, but not mush (al dente). Strain pasta and set it aside when it's done.



Preheat oven to 500 degrees. Build each dish in a large shallow baking dish. Or you can use a 9 inch glass or ceramic pie plate. Load 3 cups of pasta into each baking dish. Add one quarter of the chicken, 3 shrimp, and 2 tbls of prosciutto onto each serving. Spoon 3/4 of a cup of gratinata sauce on each serving and toss to coat. Combine 3 tbls of grated Parmesan cheese with 1 1/2 tsp paprika, then sprinkle about 1 tbls of this mixture over the top of each serving. Bake the dishes for 10-12 minutes, or until tops begin to brown.



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Audrey OCD

I've come to realize something quite significant...

I'm not the same Sheena.

I have Audrey OCD

I realized everywhere I go, everyone I talk to---all I do is talk about my darling daughter.

When Brent and I were dating and I was hanging out with my friends I didn't want then to get sick of hearing 'Brent' stories so I would refer to him as 'my friend' so unless they were really clever they wouldn't realize that the last three stories I told were about the same person or most importantly they wouldn't know they were about my boyfriend. Yes, I was clever. I hid my obsession with my boyfriend well.

Now I have an Audrey obsession. One problem---I can't cover it up.

' my friend had this crazy poop explosion '

' my friend has such a strong neck it's incredible'

Nope ' my friend ' doesn't work to cover it up. I guess there is no hiding it. I live, sleep, dream---baby these days and I love it :)

(except last night I had a dream someone kept euthanizing people by hitting a metal stake into there heads---I woke up quite disturbed. I missed my Audrey dreams.)

Another interesting thing is the whole time I was pregnant I was never ever pregnant in my dreams (besides one---were I gave birth to a jellyfish{I have messed up dreams lol} but other then that I was always not pregnant---weird eh?)

Since this blog is mostly about sleep I will end it with a sleeping picture of Audrey---she is having morning cuddles beside me right now. Ahhh I hope morning cuddles last forever!



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Almost crawling....

Standing?


Crawling?


<3


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Retraction?

I have been thinking over and over the last couple days to either delete the blog/'venting session' or write a retraction. I know it might have seemed over the top and quite emotional but in that very moment that is probably how I was feeling. Actually that was how I was feeling.

For the past five years I have been trying to skip the whole 'fakeness' and concentrate on being real and genuine. In our society it is encouraged to act like everything is perfect and 'okay' all the time. Who can really say that life is okay all the time. There are ups and downs---mountains and valleys. It takes the really low valleys to make you really appreciate the view on the mountains.

I sometimes feel like my blog is a glorified diary. Who lets the world read there diary though? I guess I better keep the emotional blogging to a minimum but at the same time I want to be able to be real with what I'm facing in my life. I'm looking forward to five years down the road reading all my old blogs and giggling to myself. I know that's something I always enjoy doing with my actual journals. It's just fun to see what was so important back then and how much you have grown etc. Maybe my pre-Brent journals were the best to read back on because page after page was about different boys and high school drama---ha ha ha.

I'm sorry for the drama my blog readers---I am Sheena and sometimes I am a little bit dramatic.

No retraction today-it might be embarrassing to look back and read but it was real and genuine and that is something I am not embarrassed about.

Shades of Summer 2010

Picked up these beauties at the beauty supplier today. These will be the shades I'm sporting this summer. There is something so therapeutic about painting your nails. It's hard to see the exact shades but trust me there cute!

I just painted my nails two nights ago so I can't justify redoing them just yet---need to wait until I'm home long enough with Brent so he can tend to Miss Converse.

I'm so excited! I'm sure there will be many more blogs about these shades and were they show up.

So fun!


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Summer Lovin'

The smell of suntan lotion
Tan lines
Warmth of the sun on my skin
Watching my hubby get hot and sweaty...it's hot lol...outside I mean
Swimming
Seasonal fruit MmmMmm
Camping
Beaches
Long walks
Flip flops

A few of my favorite summer things.

One more to add to the list is a particular bikini clad chicklet ---she it to cute for words




- your teeny weeny bikini is precious my darling baby girl

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Oh me oh my---

There is this one person in my life and this is how I would describe them

-untrustworthy
-manipulative
-two faced
-hypocrite
-gossip

Why do I have this person in my life you may ask. Everyone has one. Someone they regularly have to smile and nod to. Someone who you guard yourself around.


Brent and I were talking and we figured we had three options.

1- Cut them out of our life
2- Ignore the drama and just continue to smile and nod.
3- bring up 'drama' when it occurs and deal with it. (This person doesn't handle conflict and never apologizes so usually confronting and trying to deal with issues leads to stress and sweeping it under 'the rug')

We have done all three and none are successful. This person is a 'key' person in our lives. If our lives were a tv show they would be one of the main characters.

We are at a loss. Right now it's something we are really praying about. It's just such a sticky situation. It's so stressful dealing with a situation like this.

I remember as a child WWJD was written everywhere. That popular saying. In this situation I really don't know 'what Jesus would do'. How many times do you turn your cheek?

Anyways this is my rant. I'm sorry for being such a downer. My heart is just heavy tonight. Oh how I wish there was a easy answer.


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Congrats Audrey

Audrey is exactly 6 weeks today.
She slept through the night fully for the first time!!!

10pm-6am
Fed her...and back to sleep for a couple more hours!!!!

Go Audrey !!!


-this is the lil muffin still sleeping at her normal feeding time in the middle of the night! That's right mommy was up but baby was not ;)



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