Finding peace

We made a choice
It was the hardest one we have ever had to make. We are done having babies and having me pregnant. It's so hard. I would love the idea of getting pregnant in a few months if I didn't have to get so sick. So after much talk and many tears we are ripping off the bandaid.

The door to adoption is open we are a 3/10 or 4/10 leaning towards it. I'm just trying to find peace with this choice. Find piece that this is the path God has chosen for us, that this is how he made me.

I'm really struggling with this area in our life. I just feel overwhelmed with sadness that my body can't tolerate pregnancy.

I'm not willing to give up Brent, Audrey and Beckham for nine months! I have already given up 18 months to being sick and pregnant.

My heart is heavy.

I have two beautiful babies, I wanted five but maybe my babies are just so great that all I need is two! They are pretty cute :)

(I could see me become Michelle Dugger if I had healthy pregnancies and if we made 5 million a year haha)

I'm trying to make light of this but honestly my heart is sad. I feel like I an grieving. If you think of me and us maybe just say a prayer. We just want peace that this was the right choice for our family.