Dearest Grandma

Grandma,
You would me 91 one if you were here today. You are missed all the time. Sometimes I catch glimmers of you through my precious faded memories. I thought getting married without you would be the hardest thing I would go through without you. Having this baby inside of me, growing, has brought so many warm treasured memories rushing back as fresh as ever. I miss you and wish that I could just see you for even thirty seconds just to see the smile spread across your face when I whispered the precious words that would inform you about my hidden treasure.

You bought me my first doll, dear lil Pinky. She was pink, plush, and darling. You replaced her more times then I can count without me even knowing. I always had a fresh pink doll.

You loved me so tenderly and knew me like no other. You treasured every word I uttered and treated me like gold. You touched my heart and have left this permenent impression that only you could fill. I miss you often. I feel it most during milestones.

When I was little you knew how much I loved you. You knew how much you were my world. You graciously and selflessly prepared me for a life without you. You had hard talks with a little girl in pink who only cared that you were there when I graduates, got married, and had a baby. You braced me for the cold hard reality that you wouldn't be there for any of those momentous days. You had to gently make me aware. I would remind you time and time again that you had to be there.

Graduating without you're presence wasn't as hard as I imaginged. Probably because of the new found love I had just found. I missed you and knew you would be proud.

Getting engaged, marrying my prince without you was heartbreaking. Many tears were shed. So hard to not have you there. I wished you were there to help me choose my dress and pick out flowers. I wore pearls that day knowing how classy you would have thought they looked.

This precious baby. You would have been the most amazing great grandma. You knew this would be the hardest. When you got sick you wrapped up one last pinky and gave it to my mom to give me in case you weren't there. A precious note in your elegant handwritting has tears flooding and memories rushing. You knew me so well. How did you know that this would mean the world to me. Thank you for this one last momento. I promise to pass on beautiful stories of your love and care to all my children. It is truly sad that they never will know you like I did.




I'm so excited to pass on this toy you left me. If I have a boy it will have to wait because it was named 'pinky' for it's pink color. I did recently email the company that makes them in hopes of getting my hands on a blue one.

I love you and will treasure all our memories forever.


xoxox
-Sheena (plus Brent & baby)

*posted from iPhone